Coping With Grief & Loss

As Christians, we can sometimes feel undue pressure to fake our way through grief, lest our Christian friends think we are lacking in faith. However, we see one of the spiritual giants of Scripture, Job, freely and honestly expressing his pain.

In Job 6:2-3, he laments, “Oh, that my sadness and troubles were weighed. For they are heavier than the sand of a thousand seashores.”

If you’ve recently lost someone or something, you may be going through the grieving process. Below, we explain what grief is and how long the grieving process can be expected to take. We also offer some tips on how to cope with loss.

What Is Grief?

The emotional pain that you feel after a loss is known as “grief.” Someone who’s grieving may feel a combination of shock, disbelief, sadness, anger, fear, and guilt, which can make it difficult to eat, sleep, and engage in other routine activities. It’s common for people to lose or gain weight, become sick, and feel achy.

Many people think of grief only in terms of the death of a loved one, but it can also occur when someone loses their:

• Health (their own health or a loved one’s health)
• Marriage, engagement, or dating relationship
• Friendship
• Job
• Money
• House or personal property
• Dream
• Sense of safety (this often occurs after someone experiences a trauma)

Grief can be divided into numerous categories, including anticipatory grief, complicated grief, and disenfranchised grief.

How Long Does the Grieving Process Take?

There’s no easy answer to this question, as the grieving timeline varies from one person to another. Some individuals heal within weeks or months, while others continue grieving for years. Many people go through the five stages of grief—which include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—but it’s possible to heal without experiencing all (or any) of these stages. It is important to remember that our all-patient God is not rushing you through your grieving process.

How to Cope With Loss

Many people who are grieving a loss find it helpful to speak with a therapist. In addition to therapy, you may want to try:

• Talking to your loved ones

• Talking to your pastor or a therapist

• Joining a bereavement support group or another type of support group

• Writing in a journal

• Remaining connected to your church family

• Eating a nutritious diet

• Exercising

• Participating in your regular hobbies, even when you don't feel like it

The Help You Need to Heal From Loss

If you’re having a difficult time coping with loss, one of our counselors at Covenant Counseling Center would consider it an honor to provide a safe place, free of judgment, for you to process your loss and find healing. Contact us today to schedule an appointment.